The UPS Man

Have you ever wondered how your heavy packages are delivered? How the deliverer can handle the immense weight of you DIY Desk Set? Then I have a story for you.

The Background

I was going through my morning routine, setting up my daily game plan. After retreiving my second cup of coffee from the kitchen, I returned to my desk and was just about to sit down when I noticed a UPS truck pull up. I knew I wasn’t recieving any packages but I stood with my coffee, completely content with watching a quick drop off and finding out where it was going. Turns out this became a morning highlight for me.


I know this seems creepy, just watching someone, but I can’t help it. I can be a nosy person and I enjoy people watching just as much as wildlife watching.

The UPS Man

It was early morning, I was just coming back from getting my second cup of coffee. About to sit and start checking boxes on my to-do list, I heard something outside the window. I strained to see what made the screeching, metallic noise and spotted a UPS truck, sitting out front of my house. Like anyone, my mind instantly thought about everything I have ordered in the past month. The only thing that came to mind was my new planner that wouldn’t arrive until the following week.

Looking outside I find the driver is still in the truck. Still watching, I think it is probably for the girl in the apartment below us. Why I care so much? Why I continued to watch? I have no idea other than maybe pure boredom and the excitement of life outside my walls. I quickly drink some more coffee, about to sit again, when he finally appeared.

After all that time the UPS driver finally emerged and seemed to be on a mission. Quick paced, he handled two decent sized boxes, looking like they were both filled with an already inflated floating tubes. One was perched on his right shoulder, supported by the same arm. The other was in his left arm and braced against his left hip. He shimmied his way across the street and up the stairs of the older couple’s house across the way. He made his way to the front door, setting down the left box. Shrugging shoulders and a wobbly box confirmed my suspicions.

The couple have had a sign on their front door since the beginning of the virus outbreak. I always wondered what it said, until I watched the UPS man pick up the left box again. Struggling he retraced his footsteps, heading for the back of the house. He paused every few steps trying to get his grip on the left box again. Unable to regain his previous momentum and visibly distraught, the UPS man continues to struggle with the box. It is now clear that they do not contain air filled tubes but instead something much more dense. This delivery just got a lot harder.

As he continued his journey towards the back of the house, the struggle only increased. I knew exactly where he was headed and he was only about halfway. At this point, since he parked in front of the house, he has been on this single delivery for seven minutes. I am now involving myself so much that I am yelling at my window, “leave it and come back!” After another few seconds of trying to find his grip, something in the UPS man’s mind flipped. With a triumphant look he grabbed hold of one of the corners and dragged the box.

He clearly has lost all his shits worth giving at this point and proceeded to drag the box the rest of the way. Upon arriving at the back, side door, he drops the corner of the left box and then continues to hastily put down the box that was still resting on his right shoulder. He stretches out his arms and his body language oozes annoyance, while his face reads frustration. He opens the door and places the shoulder box into the room. He pauses. He looks over to the box that has given him so many troubles. Examining it like he wants to rip every last side apart and turn it into confetti.

He stood behind the box, facing toward the door and proceed to roll the box into the room like a square tire on a cartoon car. Once it was in he closed the door with a look such accomplishment. With triumph in his step, he pulled out his handheld and walked down towards his truck. It wasn’t until he pulled the handheld closer to his face and turned beet red; with confusion and defeat now plastered on his face, he must’ve noticed the time. This one delivery in a generic, suburb neighborhood took twelve total minutes. He scrambled back into his truck and ventured off to his next delivery.

It got a little weird.

I know, I warned you it could be a little creepy. But inspiration comes in strange ways. I wan’t to say I didn’t mean to shame a hardworking employee by writing this, quite the opposite actually. Not much can hold my attention so vividly for more than ten minutes. This encounter turned out to be my favorite entertainment of the day. This UPS man, made me laugh, question and feel concern. My creativity and mood was some of the best I had in days.

I want to recognize all the delivery and mail men and women out there. Not only are you working in a dangerous time but you are working triple the amount. Since most people are now turning to ordering online versus going into the a store, you guys have been working your butts off to make sure we get what we need. Thank you and thank you UPS man.

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